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Bakersfield's
Finest
1-888-KFI-TUTOR
As
heard on KFI AM-640 TALK-RADIO
FRESH
PERSPECTIVE
When
a child cannot face life or learning,
he
or she often escapes into unconsciousness
by
Tracy Sherwood, Tutor/Author - Superphonics.com
Therapeutic Tutoring gets to the emotional and
spiritual roots of non attentiveness accompanied
by glazed eyes, fidgeting, wrestlessness, distractibility,
short attention span, yawning and daydreaming
- mostly at learning time...
And
what of autism? And I have discovered through
actual experience, not study, that most learning
and many social and developmental disability cases,
including autism, are spiritual in nature rather
than biological. Now you may already know this
but feel alone in your viewpoint. This fact is
evident to me because were each supposed learning
disabilitiy biological in nature, due to a chemical
imbalance or such, it could not be resolved or
so miraculously dissipated by spiritual techniques
that reach in and contact the individual on a
human level.
Now
I'm not speaking of music, massages, candles,
or anything ritualistic or faith-based - not to
invalidate any of these as my experiences with
them are nil - but simple persistent focus techniques
with the right type of communication, gentlest
pressure, and of course endless patience, sees
success at end with all such cases without fail
- under certain conditions.
Please
read my article below and then call to schedule
a free consultation. My clients come to me from
around the world, because no distance is too far
to where your child will finally come to connect
with the real world.
Tracy
Sherwood
ARTICLE:
Only
two minutes into Christian's therapeutic tutoring
session for attention and focus, the seven-year-old
boy's eyes glaze over as he withdraws from facing
me – his tutor. Within 15 minutes he is eighty
percent unconscious – his head bobbing in all
directions in useless effort to keep erect and
attentive. Throughout the next hour, he
becomes partially alert several times but promptly
falls back into an unconscious state. I tap him
on the knee from time to time to keep him from
falling from the state of reduced consciousness
into the state of sleep where he will fully escape
responsibility for his own awareness.
In
the minutes prior to this session Christian had
successfully undergone simple educational exercises
to demonstrate what attention is and to find out
that only he has control of his own attention
and focus. The boy had ample sleep the night before
and has not been put into this state through hypnotism,
drugs, or mental suggestion of any kind. After
understanding what attention is and finding that
he does in actuality have control over his own
attention, he is asked to simply sit and be there
and focus his attention on me. But as he finds
himself focusing in, making knowing and deliberate
contact with me for the first time, his eyes glaze
over as he begins to withdraw - rendering him
into a state of light unconsciousness. This is
subconscious escape.
In
my thirty years of tutoring children with learning
disabilities, I have found that they nearly all
have one thing in common: they are withdrawing
because they cannot face what is in front of them
or what life expectations have for them to experience.
This withdrawal is usually manifested in other
ways such as putting attention on other things,
fidgeting, changing the subject, becoming emotional,
critical, joking, and destructive, daydreaming,
or entering a rigid non-feeling state where education,
anger, force and pleading cannot penetrate. But
when denied the use of these mechanisms, the only
escape left is to shut down by way of unconsciousness.
While
in this state of reduced consciousness, Christian
is behind the scenes with unseen determination
to stay attentive. This is what keeps his head
coming back up in attempt to re-establish its
focus position throughout the session. Sometimes
the head bobs down and doesn't come back up –
indicating that awareness has further diminished
and though progress is slowed during this period,
it is still inching its way through the layers
of unconsciousness. But this particular layer
of unconsciousness will ‘burn off' with some time,
bringing him into a lighter state of unconsciousness
where he can take back some control of his efforts
to be attentive once again - or he will awaken.
Session by session, he begins to rise above the
unconsciousness and gradually overcomes it with
his rehabilitated ability to control his attention,
focus, and remain alert while listening, reading,
and facing life.
Each
session increases his ability to perceive without
avoidance. Between sessions his parents report
change in attitude and alertness. The most common
reports tell of less fidgeting, defiance, emotional
reaction and less shyness or aggression. The positive
gains include enhanced presence and improved ability
to focus, to better make sense of things, to face
more situations that could not be faced before.
He becomes generally more cheerful, more helpful
and more affectionate where he just recently seemed
to thrill at hurting, shocking or showing his
power through defiance, or just plain tuning out.
But
as with most children with similar symptoms, Christian
has always been able to focus in areas of personal
interest like video gaming and television. How
can this be? The answer lays in the very reason
he withdraws from learning or external control.
He feels in control with video gaming and
television. With video gaming he can learn at
his own pace, error safely, target his own goals,
and try again when he fails. He will win and strive
on, or quit at will to come back later to conquer
again. He is in control. Because of these factors,
video gaming is one of the very few activities
in which he can win and feel some sense of accomplishment.
This should be understandable to us, as we are
all drawn to areas and activities in which we
have some real hope of winning and realizing some
form of accomplishment.
With
television, there is nothing expected of him.
He is a spectator with no pressure to perform.
If the subject matter goes over his head, he can
settle for tuning into the visuals, changing the
channel, or leaving the television. There is no
one telling him what to do or how to do it, other
than perhaps what, when and how much television
he is permitted to watch. And because the television
is an escape from external demands of life and
learning and because he has proven to self and
others that he cannot live up life and learning,
he strongly protests when that same control enters
into the comfort zones of video gaming or television.
And when it's time to perform in life or learning,
his only escape is to find any distraction possible
including thoughts of past, future, or the tiny
wad of paper between his fingers. He drops his
pencil a dozen times, slides down into his seat,
and his eyes glaze over as though no one is present.
And to a most certain degree, they are not.
Both
parents sat in on Christian's initial tutoring
session which also served as an assessment to
customize Christian's tutoring program. Christian
was in the second grade and in April it was determined
that he would be held back next year. He was unable
to learn the alphabet sounds and learn to read.
He also could not do simple arithmetic. His teacher
said he was highly distractible, disruptive, fidgety,
and would not pay attention in class enough to
learn a thing.
Christian's
tutoring program would include my Superphonics
techniques and Arithmetic, but to make progress
in these, he needed specialized concentration
and focus training and there again, only made
possible by a Validation Therapy Program. It would
take a few months, at two hours per week and his
mother would sit in on sessions to learn the simpler
techniques to practice at home for swifter progress.
In
the first session, Christian was extremely defiant
with his mother calling her stupid and telling
her to shut-up. He resisted his mother's presence
and urges but responded favorably to my communication
and techniques. I attempted to reprimand him for
his abuses to his mother and he came around with
much effort, but it was clear this was a momentary
improvement and far from remedial.
Although
Christian learned the alphabet sounds and then
to read and spell beginning level words within
a few sessions, his mother continued to come in
upset about his behavior at home, in school and
especially his verbal abuse to her in and out
of the tutoring sessions. Some of this improved
within a few more sessions, but I constantly had
to work to keep him focused in the sessions although
his progress was good. He was able to make good
progress because the techniques were powerful
yet conceptually simple for him. But he was not
penetrable when it came to explaining instructions
to him. He would look at me with glazed eyes and
when asked what was said he would be mentally
blank.
I
could see it was time to break through the ‘wall
of daze' and bring him out where he would make
much swifter and more lasting progress. This would
require some hours and untiring patience on my
part, but it had to be done. So explaining the
concentration techniques to his mother and then
to Christian in words he could understand, we
began the venture into this little boy's inability
to be attentive and positively responsive. It
was time to come out and rise above his unknowing
tendency to withdraw.
So
the focus sessions go on with Christian staying
alert and focusing for longer periods each session
before falling into unconsciousness. And each
session he gains more ability to keep trying even
throughout his dark periods of blackout. At each
session's end he comes groggily out of it on his
own and awakens less cranky and more willing to
continue. I then take him through a simple but
remarkable technique that fully awakens him, and
brings him to a level of light cheerfulness. He
goes home and comes to his next session quite
willing to face the diminishing darkness once
again.
His
mother is in need of more patience to help him
practice between sessions, so she too undergoes
this technique and more training as well.
It's important that she knows how to interact
with and preserve these new abilities in her son.
A child, like any adult, can be extremely powerful
and it's important not to thwart that power but
to preserve and guide it effectively. It's equally
important, that the child is willing to undergo
these sessions and that he or she sees the need
and has the desire to improve attention control.
Otherwise, we will reinforce the negative rather
than make progress. I must stress the delicacy
of this undertaking; it requires much skill, steadfastness
and understanding of everything involved.
At
first Christian said he did not want to be able
to pay attention or improve his behavior. But
I knew that all children want to do well; they
sometimes just can't admit it because they are
giving in, which means losing. They also have
little hope of doing better. Therefore,
forcing admittance is not constructive.
So I take another approach which quickly brings
about his desire and hope of some little wins,
and hope of improved relations outside the protective
wall that has been protecting him.
Once
a child is willing to try, I know it's just a
matter of 5 to 20 hours before all is resolved
and life becomes very, very different for this
child and all who influence him and are influenced
by him. When the dark clouds are out of the way,
the world is not so difficult to face. Expectations,
if delivered with effective guidance and faith,
are not so difficult to meet. The world isn't
such a dangerous place; one only needs an ability
to perceive it.
Christian
is now able to be attentive without avoidance
and giving into distraction. He has reclaimed
his spirit of play and his true personality has
come out in full bloom. Although he has
much to catch up on academically, he is now reading
and spelling and can think with mental math. He
is doing well in school and will not be retained
in the second-grade.
As
heard on KFI AM-640 TALK-RADIO, Tracy Sherwood,
award-winning Tutor, is author of ‘Superphonics'.
She has tutored all ages and subjects for 32 years
and is tutor to celebrities. She specializes in
children who really try but are struggling because
they cannot focus, concentrate, retain or conceptualize
to learn. Tracy moved from Los Angeles
to Bakersfield last year and may be contacted
by calling 661-663-8886. Her web site address
is Superphonics.com Copyright Tracy Sherwood,
2005.
Now
enrolling students for the
Malibu
2-week Resort program for June, 2006.
Come
to a seminar or schedule Tutoring Assessment
1-888-KFI-TUTOR
Bakersfield
and Palmdale call 661-663-8886
Main
program location is now in Bakersfield's Seven
Oaks
11512
Marazion Hill Court, Bakersfield CA -
93311
Palmdale
location is in Rancho Vista area
near
25th west and Rancho Vista
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